I’ve come to believe that certain philosophies in life don’t really vouch for much. Take for instance, letting go of people you can’t imagine life without. A lover who left, a family or friend who passed away. A beloved pet that died. If you’ve loved them truly, how can you ever let them go?
True, each passing day makes you grieve more. True, each moment makes you want to pull them out of the memories. True, just a thought of the times spent with them, makes your heart bleed some more. And with time, you get accustomed to the ensuing despair.
And it’s not that you haven’t tried to get out of such times that test your courage and resolute? Such testing times that you never wanted to be a part of. You have tried. Given away every ounce of energy left, just so the times cleave off you. Yes, you have tried. Your heart knows you have.
But what does one do when even the slightest effort in that direction only brings a surge of sinking emotions, rendering you helpless. Nothing rescues you. Seclusion, prayers, meditation, introspection, self-severity, purposeful distractions, all prove in vain. It’s like a dead end.
As time flies, the pain hurts less, but you’re sore within. Each day wipes out the memories a bit more. But it’s never really gone. It’s like looking out the window through the curtains. The view is faded, obscure. But the rays come rushing in as soon as the curtain shifts.
And you tell yourself, it’s never going to be possible. You thought you did let go. You even forgave. You made peace with the past. But the truth is, it’s all lurking around the corner and jumps right at you, startling you at the feeblest reminiscences.
I feel we never learn to let go. It’s always there. Out of sight, but never out of mind. We grieve, bleed, die a little each time. So whether you let go or not, remember one thing – Remember to live, while you grow over these testing times, allow yourself to heal.
Waiting to hear your experiences on the topic. Do share them. 🙂
This post was written for the #Blogchatter prompt ‘Testing Times’.